LOTS of things

is it too early to hate the redskins?

i am so exhausted. the past five weeks have been brutal, and the proverbial emotional rollercoaster almost ran off the tracks. fyi-i hate cliches. anyway, i'm completely moved, although i still have boxes of crap in my living room. i have a full-time job now: say hello to Mt. Carmel Elem's newest English teacher. look out, 7th graders! that was a very strange morning.

OLMC Elem's principal called me at 8:30 to tell me i'd gotten the job. i was ecstatic, and i called my parents. my dad answers, and i know immediately that something's wrong. then he told me that my grandpa had died earlier that morning. it had to have been not too long before my call because otherwise he would have called me. so within the space of ten minutes, i had gone from jumping up and down to crumpled on the floor. it's so strange.

one thing that i'm grateful for is my upcoming trip to the beach. God knows that i need a serious vacation. He already knows what i need before i do and comes through in spades.

in that vein, i feel a need to break open a bottle of champagne. or, on my budget of $0, a bottle of arbor mist. i don't think i've felt this way in years, and i'm so excited. revelations and vulnerabilities are so hard to come by, and the moment another person lets you in, you realize that your world has been changing. we picture pivotal moments and fairy tale words, but nothing ever happens the way we rehearse it in our heads. that makes it so much better.

at the moment, any pollock painting is pretty representative of my life right now, and it probably won't make much more sense anytime soon. but that's okay.

he colors it beautiful.