wtf?

that helicopter crash in afghanistan really freaked me out. there was the strong possibility that a friend of mine was there, and i hoped to God that he wasn't. thankfully, he wasn't, but it was a big blow to him and his community. i have a high regard for those who will put their lives on the line so that we can continue to have the liberties that are singular to our country. and for him to do what he does, i respect him quite a lot.

and then there's the london bombing yesterday. i was there a year ago, at a conference where i delivered a paper on 9/11. one of my listeners asked how the entire country could be so traumatized over something that happened only in three locales. and now, what a gross and disgusting irony.

the lady and i didn't stay in touch, and i can only wonder what she's going through now. it doesn't matter that the scales of the attacks are different. what does matter is that it really pisses me off. it's plain that every generation experiences something that really fucks up their world--that's no newsflash. but i just can't wrap my mind around it. i'm sitting in my living room, having the great things that i have, and there are people out there just like me getting blown to pieces just for riding the wrong double-decker bus.

i'm not naive. we're an incredibly violent species. but i find the mixture of the glorious and the profane very disconcerting. and somewhere in there, there's room for mercy and grace. this is where it's very easy to get cynical and angry. but i'm no nihilist either. we do have our redemption. i see it in my nephew Manny. he was born only two months before 9/11, and that day, i remember being terrified for him because of the world that he was going to grow up in. but his tiny fingers, bright little face and baby growls--he was the one who soothed me. i really believe that Christ gives us the ability to embody grace for each other, and that, however hard it may be to see and believe, is our victory. our potential to receive and live in that grace undermines everything these people do.

and thanks to those who fight to give that grace. we all miss you.